Goodbye, Atlanta

Atlanta, I’ve worked at CL for five years and served as the music editor for a little more than a year-and-a-half. I think we’ve had a good run: the Corndogoramas, the Drive-Invasions — sheesh, too much stuff to list — the Music Midtowns, competing radio shows downtown. OK, maybe not all those. We also had sad times: the closings of Echo Lounge, Nine Lives Saloon, Backstreet, Dottie’s and the general disappointment of nightlife abruptly ending at 2 a.m. instead of spilling into Sunday brunch. I wish I could say something poignant to prove how much potential I think you have, but I’m moving on anyway.

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1) It’s not you, it’s me. I mean, I get it: Sweet tea is delicious, but I hate the stuff.

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2) Actually, it is you. You’re so damn hot, then so cold; I really need a city with four distinct seasons.

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3) I’m ready for kids. In fact, I already have one. But this city passed a law that restaurants can have smokers or kids. Y’all won’t quit smoking and the kid and I are hungry.

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4) We just don’t want the same things. You want me to hop in my car to go everywhere. I like to walk around and ride trains that conveniently take me to places other than the airport.

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5) There’s someone else. D.C. and I have a long history, and I just can’t deny the chemistry anymore. Good luck, Atlanta.