The Blotter: Hoarding issues

In Midtown, cops responded to a fight call at a loft in Midtown. A downstairs neighbor said he heard crashing and banging, so he called police. “We knocked on the door and [a 42-year-old man] answered the door while holding a towel over his face with blood on it,” the reporting officer wrote. “When he removed the towel, small cuts could be seen above his upper lip ... he would not tell me how it happened and was the only person in the loft when we arrived.” The man said he and his husband have been married for 10 years and they’ve been living in this loft for five years. Also, he said his husband is “a hoarder.” The cop looked around and noted that the “apartment was filled with various items and made it difficult to see the evidence of a fight. But there was a mirror laying on the ground that the [man] said was his ‘favorite mirror,’ which had been broken during the altercation.”

The 42-year-old refused to give details on how the mirror was broken and insisted that he did not want to press charges. Neighbors say the couple fights all the time and make a ton of noise.

Redneck deluxe

A 22-year-old from Athens posted an ad to sell an iPhone 5S on Craigslist and got an offer from an unusual man. The 22-year-old agreed to meet the man outside a McDonald’s on Northside Drive to complete the sale. The man had a silhouette of a naked woman shaved onto the side of his head in his hairline. The 22-year-old told police it’s “the same kind of naked woman silhouette that is commonly seen on truck mud flaps.”

Undeterred, the 22-year-old decided to go ahead with the deal. He handed over the iPhone and the man gave him a stack of 12 $50 bills and then drove away. Moments later, the 22-year-old realized all 12 $50 bills were counterfeit and tried to chase the guy. Alas, the man with a naked woman shaved into his head was long gone. Note: Never do business with any person who has body illustrations “commonly seen on truck mud flaps.”

Just plain bold

Early one morning in Poncey-Highland, alarms went off at a trendy store. “Upon arrival, I noticed a white Dodge pickup truck (engine still running) parked in the rear of the .., store,” a cop noted. Thousands of dollars of merchandise was gone — mostly designer clothes. On playback of security cameras, the pickup truck was seen rear-ending the service window and smashing into the store. Five men wearing black hooded sweaters entered the store and stole large quantities of designer clothes, jeans, caps, and socks. They left the white truck behind.

Don’t ride with strangers

Two Roswell men were staying at a high-end hotel in Midtown. They decided to go for a walk down Piedmont Avenue at around 2 a.m. Suddenly, it started raining and a dark-colored car pulled up, driven by an unknown woman with a guy riding in the back seat. Not wanting to walk in the rain, the Roswell men decided to ask the couple in the car for a ride. Sure, the couple agreed, and they hopped in. The back-seat guy said he was going to get some beer from the trunk so they could all party. When he walked back from the trunk, he pulled out a silver gun and demanded the Roswell men’s stuff. They handed over their cell phones, jackets, wallets, a pair of alligator shoes ($500), and an American Eagle sweater.

Pit stop gone wrong

A 38-year-old man decided to stop for a drink at a local bar. He parked his black Jeep and ran inside. Less than an hour later, he returned to his car and found that the window was busted. The distraught man called police and said he’d left some really valuable stuff in the car while he was in the bar, including his wedding ring ($25,000), laptop computer, iPad, Gucci shoes ($680), and Ralph Lauren purple label suit ($2,500). The man offered no explanation for why he removed his wedding ring and left it in the car.

Pride and weapons

A man was shot in the leg and went to Grady Memorial Hospital for help. The man told cops that earlier, he was hanging out in an alley behind a vacant house, gambling and throwing dice with some guys. He said someone became angry and started shooting, so he ran and then realized he’d been shot in the leg. The man said he only knew the gambling guys by their street names, and he really didn’t know who shot him. Suddenly, the man said, “The crazy thing about all of this is I just got my driver’s license today.” The cop asked if he’d left his car at the vacant house. The man stuttered and said he didn’t own a car. Perplexed, the officer talked to a nurse treating the man. She said his gunshot wound was angled down on the thigh, just above the knee as if he had accidentally shot himself while attempting to pull a gun from his pocket.

Items in the Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.