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The Blotter March 22 2006

Bizarre crimes from Atlanta police reports

A POLICE OFFICER was on a horse, completing a training exercise for the Mounted Patrol Unit in College Park. The officer wrote, "While mounting police horse named 'Bruno,' said horse did spook at something, causing officer to be dragged underneath horse for approximately six feet, due to foot being caught in stirrup."

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The officer continued, "During said action, officer's left foot/ankle was kicked by horse, receiving small abrasion and soreness, and hands received dirt burn." No medical attention was required.

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AT A POLICE PRECINCT, a man was spotted leaving a police officer's office, with a glass plaque in his hand. Police stopped the man and asked, "How did you get into the office?" The man said he was headed to Underground Atlanta and he noticed that the police precinct was empty, so he came in and was locked inside. He said he noticed the glass plaque on a desk. So he grabbed the plaque and walked through the police precinct with it. The man, age 53, went to jail for burglary.

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A COCKEYED WOMAN attacked an officer at the city jail on Peachtree Street. (She'd been arrested for street fighting.) She tried to kick, punch and head-butt the officer. She also bit the officer's middle finger. (Fortunately, the officer was wearing black leather gloves, so the bite didn't puncture his skin.) The officer wrote, "[The woman] in actuality needed to be charged with felony charges, but due to time restraints was charged with correlating city ordinances." The woman, age 29, was charged with disorderly conduct.

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AT THE CORNER OF FIFTH AND JUNIPER streets, two officers were conducting surveillance on some known male prostitutes. One man stepped into oncoming traffic and flagged down a car. The officers arrested the man for pedestrian violations. They asked, "Why are you flagging down vehicles?" The man got irate and said, "This is the city of Atlanta, and I can do whatever the fuck I want, and you can't do a thing about it!" During arrest, the man struggled with the officers. "[He] raised his leg and kicked me in the testicles," one officer wrote.

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A POLICE OFFICER WROTE, "I sustained an injury to my left wrist while training at the Police Academy during a prisoner cuffing/restraint exercise. As a result of this training, my left wrist became sore and swollen. To date, I am still experiencing pain."

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SOMEONE LEFT A HARASSING MESSAGE on the voice mail of a church on Peachtree-Dunwoody Road. The caller said the church should feel shame like some churches in Alabama and they should get rid of the person who answers the phone. Also, the caller identified himself by name and left his phone number. A police report was filed.

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ON FAIR STREET, a woman said she'd been receiving harassing phone calls. The callers are from a man and a woman — whom she's never met — trying to persuade her to give them her bank account number so they can make an illegal deposit into her account from a government grant program.

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AROUND 2:30 A.M. at a popular Midtown nightclub, a male customer was standing in the club's kitchen, urinating on the kitchen sink and floor. The man, age 26, said another patron told him to do it in the kitchen. The man was arrested for indecency.

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A MARRIED COUPLE were asleep inside a church on Moreland Avenue. (Apparently, that is where they live.) They heard a loud sound of a church window breaking. They looked outside and saw a man grab a crutch and beat on the windows. The husband took the crutch away from the man and called police. The man, age 47, was arrested for vandalizing a place of worship. He had a red pocket knife at the time of arrest.

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AT A SEX TOY SHOP on Peachtree Street, a man tried to hide a cock ring in his pocket. Employees stopped him and called police. The man, age 22, said he put the cock ring in his shirt as a joke. He went to jail for shoplifting. The cock ring is valued at $8.95.

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AN OFFICER was in an unmarked patrol car on McDaniel Street. He was waiting for the train to pass. A man walked up to the officer's car and said he had HIV and asked the officer to buy him a soda at the store. "I don't want your money," the man said. "I just want you to go to the store to buy me a soda." The man walked closer and noticed the officer's police badge, which was hanging around his neck. "Oh, you're the police," the man said.

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The officer replied, "I'm sorry, I'm gonna have to decline you." The man got mad that the officer wouldn't give him money for a soda. So the officer arrested him for aggressive solicitation. When the man was searched, police found eight $1 bills on his person.

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AT A PHARMACY on Headland Road, employees performed an inventory of the pharmaceuticals. They noticed that a large amount of hydracodeine and Viagra had been ordered, but the drugs never made it to the pharmacy shelves. (The missing drugs totaled more than $4,000 worth of hydracodeine and an undetermined amount of Viagra.) They examined the original drug orders on a computer, and noticed that a fellow employee had altered the order, drastically increasing the amount of hydracodeine and Viagra. They confronted the employee, a 27-year-old woman. She confessed and was arrested.

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Items in The Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.





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