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The Blotter October 11 2006

Bizarre crimes from Atlanta police reports

A WOMAN CLIMBED A TREE in a parking lot on Garnett Street and refused to come down, according to a witness. It was between 7-7:30 a.m. Officers with the Atlanta Police Department, the Atlanta Fire Department and Grady Memorial Hospital medics all tried to talk the woman down from the tree. She refused to budge. Around 9 a.m., firefighters used a ladder truck to get up in the tree and remove the woman. She was taken to Grady Hospital without any injuries. The woman, 23, wore a white T-shirt and jeans.

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A 30-YEAR-OLD WOMAN was driving down I-20 one afternoon. She noticed a bathtub in the middle of the expressway. She tried to avoid the bathtub, but failed. She slammed into the bathtub, damaging her front bumper, driver's side doors and the rear quarter panel. No injuries were reported.

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AROUND 3 A.M. AT A BUCKHEAD NIGHTCLUB, a British man approached a police officer. The British man, 39, said he was trying to finish his drink, when a security guard grabbed him and tossed him out. The officer noted that the British man smelled of booze and had a hard time keeping his balance. Then, another British man walked up and gave the same story. The security guard said he told the men to head for the exit because the bar was closing. He said the British men refused to leave, saying they were going to finish their drinks first.

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The first British man said he wanted to file a police report because he could not believe how he was treated by Southern Americans. A police report was filed. The British man thanked the officer and walked away.

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A 33-YEAR-OLD MAN WAS PATRONIZING a bar at Underground Atlanta. He said another man tried to befriend him. The two men walked out to the bar patio. The 33-year-old said he was drunk and doesn't remember certain details about what happened next. However, he does know his new friend broke his nose. Medics arrived and took him to the hospital. He doesn't know the other man's name.

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A 25-YEAR-OLD WOMAN walked into the Underground Atlanta police precinct to file a report. She said while she was at the bank, she put her book on the counter while making her transaction. When she finished her banking business, she forgot about the book and walked out. The book is called Sex Matters (worth $64.96), and inside the book was her Georgia student loan check for $2,487.21. When she returned to the bank, both the sex book and the check were gone.

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A WOODSTOCK MAN said he left his Chevy Suburban parked at Buckhead Loop one afternoon. When he returned, the Suburban was gone. According to the man, the Suburban contained 20 Oriental rugs worth $234,000. He said he just bought the Suburban.

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A 68-YEAR-OLD MAN walked into the Auburn Avenue police precinct and said he was threatened by his neighbor, a bald man with severe burn scars on his face. The 68-year-old said he was locked out of his apartment, so he sat on the stairs all day. He said his neighbor called the cops on him three times. Eventually, another neighbor gave the 68-year-old a chair to sit on while he was locked out, to cut down on the confusion. The 68-year-old said his neighbor with the face scars threatened him by saying, "I'll kill you, but I don't have to kill you. I'll get the people I deal with to kill you." Then, the neighbor with the face scars went on and on about a letter from the apartment managers that supposedly addressed residents sitting on the stairs. The neighbor with the face scars wore a straw hat. No further information.

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ON BENTEEN AVENUE, a 36-year-old woman said she'd had an ongoing problem with her neighbor. She said she'd called police on her neighbor twice that morning for playing loud music. She said her boyfriend wrote the neighbor a letter to try and work out the issue peacefully. The neighbor wrote them a letter back. It read: "Thank you for being civil. Your wife on the other hand is a creepy fucking bitch." The wife filed a police report for receiving a harassing letter.

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A 38-YEAR-OLD WOMAN walked into a grocery store on Ponce de Leon Avenue. A security guard saw her grab two bottles of hair conditioner and walk into the bathroom. Apparently, while in the bathroom, she dumped the hair conditioner on her hair and then tried to leave the store without paying. She was arrested for shoplifting.

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A MAN OWNS SOME VACANT PROPERTY on Humphries Avenue. Two other men were planting some plants on the vacant property when they uncovered some bones. When the owner examined the bones, he thought they were human bones. So he called 911. An officer with the Fulton County Examiner's Office arrived and checked out the bones. He said they looked like the bones of a calf, and saw marks on the bones that were typical for butchered meat. The bones were taken in for further tests.

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THE MANAGER OF A VITAMIN STORE on Caroline Street said a man in khaki pants walked in and swiped a 42-pack of Myoplex protein. He fled before police arrived.

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A MIDDLE-AGED MAN said he was at a motel on Forrest Hill Drive with a woman. He fell asleep, and when he woke up, his car keys had vanished from the motel room. He looked outside: His car — a white Chevy C15 — was also gone. The man called police and reported the theft, but he didn't know the first or last name of the woman with whom he had spent the night.

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Items in The Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.





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