The Blotter June 04 2008

Petty theft

SIGN THE ECONOMY SUCKS, PART 476: A 66-year-old man said someone broke into his home on Roxboro Road. He said the glass on his front door was broken, and several drawers had been disturbed. The only item reported stolen: $1 cash. Damage to the man's front door: about $100.

CATAPULT: On West Shadowlawn Avenue, a 33-year-old man said he was loading his wife's car. He said his cat darted out of the house and ran under his SUV. The man said he put his laptop on top of his SUV and tried to lure the cat from underneath the vehicle. Eventually, he said, he grabbed the cat and took it back inside the house. But he forgot his laptop was on top of his SUV and left it there. Later, his wife hopped into his vehicle and drove away. "[The man] contacted his wife a short time later, but the laptop was nowhere to be found," police wrote. The IBM laptop is worth $1,800.

SALAD DAYS: At a diner on Roswell Road, a waitress said a drunk man walked in and ordered some food. "After getting his starter salad, he passed out at the booth table and wouldn't get up. He then urinated in his pants and it soaked through to the booth seat," according to the police report. "I tried to revive him and he would wake up briefly and swing his arms toward me to ward me off, as he demanded I go away," an officer wrote. So the officer handcuffed him. "Afterwards, I had to physically pick him up by his pants and shirt to get him out of the restaurant and into my patrol vehicle ..." The man was charged with disorderly conduct while intoxicated. He hails from McDonough.

NUTTY NEIGHBOR: At an apartment complex on Kimberly Drive, two female roommates said a man banged on their front door and kicked it in. They said he ran straight to their bathroom, flushed the toilet several times and screamed for them to call police. So an officer showed up. The man denied that he ever flushed the toilet. The women said they've seen this man in the neighborhood, but they don't really know him. Other neighbors said this same man had kicked on their doors and yelled for help. The man kept saying he was running from people who were out to kill him — because they thought he was involved in a shooting. At this point, an officer recognized him — because he'd given this same man a ride about an hour ago. "He kept looking over his shoulder and stating that someone was following him ... when nobody was around us," the officer recalled. The man went to Grady Memorial Hospital for observation. One neighbor said she's known the man for years, and she's never seen him act like this before.

THE PLOT AGAINST YOU THICKENS: Around 1 a.m., a man was allegedly drinking from a one-pint bottle of Bud Ice at the intersection of Williams and Eighth streets. When the man spotted a police patrol car, he tossed the Bud Ice bottle behind him, an officer wrote. The officer put the man in the back of his patrol car for a chat. "He told me he was a CSI investigator and that he was being made to suffer for being homeless," the officer wrote. The 31-year-old man's speech was slurred and he had a hard time standing and walking, the officer noted. He went to jail for drinking in public.

PAIN AT THE PUMP: A 23-year-old woman said she stopped to get gas and noticed a Snickers bar hanging out of the gas tank of her 2006 Chevy Malibu. Then, she said, she noticed scratch marks on her car's hood, driver's side door and rear window.

CHICK FIGHT: A fight broke out between two women at a bar on North Highland Avenue. When an officer arrived, one woman was holding an ice pack to her head, and she had a bruise and a cut on her head. She said she was in the bathroom with her friend when the fight happened. She said another woman walked into the bathroom and appeared impatient. She said she exchanged words with the other woman "concerning the amount of time she has to wait in order to use the restroom," the officer wrote. She said the woman was holding a drink — and she used the glass to hit her head. Two other women in the bathroom broke up the fight and called police. The other woman left before police arrived, but witnesses described her — and the tag number of the car she left in. So the officer tracked her down on Pearl Street. She admitted she got in a fight over bathroom availability. The officer asked, "Why did you leave the scene?" She replied, "I just wanted to get out of there." The woman, age 36, went to jail.

STRANGE CUSTOMER SERVICE: At a Mrs. Winners on Donald Lee Hollowell Parkway, a cashier said a man walked in, threw money down on the counter and said he wanted something to eat. The cashier said she told the man to put the money into her hands because "she could not pick up the money due to the length of her nails," an officer wrote. The cashier said the man reacted negatively to her request, and he threatened to shoot up the place and reached into his pocket as if he had a gun. The man left before police arrived.

Items in the Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words. Want more? Listen to the Blotter Diva on 92.9's (Dave FM) "The Zakk Tyler Morning Show" every Tuesday between 6:30-7 a.m.

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