The Blotter April 26 2012

GOODWILL HUNTING: A 31-year-old Buckhead man said he bought a diamond engagement ring for his girlfriend about a month ago. He didn't propose right away because he was waiting for the right moment. In the meantime, he hid the engagement ring inside a coat pocket. (Apparently, it's an old coat he doesn't wear very often.) One day, his girlfriend went on a cleaning spree and took his old coat to Goodwill. Freaked out, the man raced to the thrift store to look for the coat with the hidden prize. No luck. The coat was long gone. The princess-cut diamond ring is worth about $3,200. Did he still want to marry her?

ONE-NIGHT STAND FROM HELL: A 22-year-old woman said she met a guy while she was checking her mailbox at her Moury Avenue apartment complex. They chatted, and the guy asked for her phone number. He called right away, wanting a date that very night. So they went to a club. Apparently, they really clicked — at around 3 a.m., they rushed back to her apartment and got naked.

While having sex the woman said she noticed a wedding ring on the man's finger. She asked: Are you married? The man said that no, he's not technically married, but he's "married to the money." Then, he admitted his baby momma lives in the same apartment complex. The woman insisted the man leave, but he refused, and instead accused her of stealing his money. The man then threatened to call police. "Go ahead," the woman said. He grabbed her cell phone and pretended to call 911. Quickly, the man hung up and decided to rob her instead. The woman says he held onto her cell phone, snatched her iPad off the bed, and ran out of her apartment.

The woman followed the man, who hopped into a red pickup truck. She wrote down the license plate number and called police.

An officer found the red truck parked outside another apartment in the same complex. The woman and the officer waited and watched the apartment door. Eventually, One-Night-Stand Man walked out of the apartment carrying a baby in a crib. His wife was next to him. When the man saw the cop — and the woman he just had sex with — he instantly confessed. The furious wife offered to help police search her own apartment for the stolen items. The wife found the stolen cell phone stuffed in a silver purse in her baby's room. The iPad was in her husband's closet.

One-Night-Stand Man went to jail on numerous charges.

COLOR SCHEME: In Reynoldstown, a man was hanging out at his home on Manigault Street when he heard a loud bang. He went outside and saw people pouring cans of white paint on his dark-blue house. (The paint-flinging group consisted of four guys and one gal.) The man yelled and ran after them, but they got away. He said one suspect was a guy in his late 30s wearing cut-off jeans. The man said he'd never met the paint-throwers before, and has no idea why they would smear white paint on his dark-blue house.

LAZY PROCRASTINATOR AWARD: At around 3:45 a.m., a blond Alabama woman drove by a parked police car in a Nissan with only one working headlight. So the officer pulled her over. The woman said the light bulb had burned out. But the solution was already inside her car. The woman "produced a bulb she had bought but didn't install yet," the officer wrote. It gets worse. Turns out, the woman's Alabama driver's license was revoked in 2006. Of course, there's no insurance on her car, either. The officer arrested the 32-year-old and took her to jail. Her Nissan was impounded.

SELF-INCRIMINATION AWARD: Sometimes, people make cops' jobs almost too easy. A 20-year-old Decatur woman is accused of "yelling and being irate" on Joseph Lowery Boulevard. Two cops pulled up. The woman reportedly "approached the patrol car and began to kick and slap the car, while yelling, 'Take me home or I will kill somebody or myself.'" An officer asked her to stop hitting the car and to calm down. The woman kept punching the car and said, "I got some weed, too." She told him the weed was in her purse and asked that she be taken to jail. Police looked in her black purse and, lo and behold, there was a small bag of suspected marijuana. The woman got her wish — she went to jail on disorderly conduct and drug possession charges.

Items in the Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.

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