Bar Review - It’s easy being green

You don’t have to travel to Savannah or Chicago to find the luck of the Irish. Hell, half their luck is found behind the counter of almost any bar. Save the cost of a plane ticket or gas and head over to the Highland’s Irish pub, Limerick Junction, Buckhead’s Fado, the English-style Rose & Crown, Decatur’s more European Brick Store Pub, or even the not-so-European North Highland Pub to find all that’s required for a “proper” St. Patrick’s Day celebration.

A truly traditional March 17 has only one ingredient: beer, and lots of it. Forget Harp and other so-called Irish beers, because the folks on the Emerald Isle think that stuff’s so filthy they don’t even carry it in most bars. For a country of beer purists, a glass of unadulterated Guinness is the only thing fit to drink. No exceptions.

But for those who look at Guinness’s solid layer of foam and think it might not be such a good idea to ingest a liquid you can almost walk across, a few adulterations can make a glass of it easier on lightweight American stomachs. By floating Guinness on top of another beer, you not only get two beers for the price of one (and a half, probably), but you also get to finish the strong stuff first and move on to lighter, gentler spirits.

A Half and Half is a pint filled, as the name suggests, halfway with Harp and topped with Guinness. Use Bass instead of Harp to make a Black and Tan. But know the bartender before ordering one of these. Bass is an English beer, and the name “Black and Tan” is actually a reference to the uniforms of English soldiers. Asking an Irish bartender to pollute Guinness with anything associated with England could get you nothing stiffer than a kick in the pants.

To spare yourself the trouble, why not try a Car Bomb? The only thing exploding from one of these is a slew of bubbles that rise to the top when a shot of Bailey’s Irish Cream and Jameson or Bushmills Irish whiskey is dropped into a half-pint of Guinness. Though it’s not pure, “destroying” a perfect glass of Guinness is certainly more pardonable when it’s bombed with the choicest of Irish liquors. If you’re smart and don’t drink and drive, motor vehicles won’t be blown up after a few of these are ordered, but that doesn’t mean the drink doesn’t come with a little danger — to get to the shot, the half-pint has to be chugged.

For those who think chugging is better left to beers not associated with the word “stout,” try throwing back a couple of shots. Keep the shot glass out of the Guinness and order an I to I. It’s still a shot of Irish whiskey and Bailey’s, just without all the murky beer clouding its sweet, creamy flavor. To make your head spin a little quicker, try adding amaretto and brandy — called an Irish Headlock — for a sharper, sweeter flavor.

But if you favor a sweeter — not sharper — morning, don’t let your vices grip you too hard or you may feel that last Headlock (or two) like a vice around your temples the next day. A cool glass of water (preferably from the world-famous Irish springs) will help pace the evening and keep your face from turning as lovely a shade of emerald as the isle. Or try giving those vices a little more of what they want and start the day off right with another shot of Bailey’s ... in a good strong cup of coffee, of course. Luck be with you.