Cover Story: MIDDLE-OF-THE-ROAD ROCK

Like you, I’ve survived more, fallow rock-is-dead periods than seems fair. Still, I’m hard-pressed to recall an era or genre quite so musically bankrupt as the pallid neo-classic frat-boy rock of the mid-’90s.

And who epitomizes this infernal nexus of insinuatingly catchy/incessantly bland music better than the once ubiquitous Hootie and the Blowfish. Though it has been argued that the South Carolina quartet was merely a “bar band made good,” that’s no excuse for their dull-as-dishwater, geriatric rock. For those still devoted, erstwhile band vocalist Darius “Don’t Call Me Hootie” Rucker (Fri., 6:45 p.m., Coca-Cola/V103/WB36! Stage) appears in a rare solo turn.

Right after the multi-platinum August and Everything After album, excitable wags began mentioning the Counting Crows (Sat., 7 p.m., Miller Lite/99X Stage) in the same breath as the Band and Van Morrison, but time and cooler heads have since prevailed to show the Crows are more along the lines of, say, Bob Seger. Earnest, sincere and terminally whiny, Adam Duritz and company make Third Eye Blind seem (almost) dangerous. Also appearing Saturday evening is regional favorite Edwin McCain (Sat., 8 p.m., Sanyo/Turner South/Civic Center Stage), alt-rock’s very own Gordon Lightfoot. (And believe you me this is not a compliment.) Strum, strum, strum ... yawn.

New Orleans’ Better Than Ezra (Sun., 6:30 p.m., Jose Cuervo/96 Rock Stage) rounds out this quadruple threat of insipidity. Proving it’s never too early to become a one-hit wonder, Ezra pounds out continuous variations on their future K-Tel records space saver “Good.”

If you’re looking to relive those beer-sodden, frat parties of yore, there’s your three-day ticket. All others are advised to look elsewhere for rock with actual personality.??