True Blood’ season 2, episode 11

What do you get for the God who has everything? A silk tie? A severed ring finger? Virgins? All fine ideas, but the still-beating heart of a supernatural being would truly let him know you care. And Maryann cares. Really really cares.

The mystery of Maryann wasn’t necessarily solved last night, but it was explained. Sort of. Bill’s audience with the Queen (Evan Rachel Wood) revealed the convoluted, delusional backstory that gave rise to Maenads. “Everything that exists imagined itself into existence,” the Queen says to Bill between Latvian boys and games of Yahtzee. Maenads basically willed themselves immortal over the millennium through free love, bestiality and cannibalism. It’s all in the name of a higher power — the God Who Comes — who, despite his name, rarely shows up. So here’s where the sacrifices come in. Despite having spent 100-plus lifetimes developing immortality, all Maryann wants is to die. Tricky, right? Not if you have a supernatural: someone such as Sam, or even Sookie, who “straddles the two worlds.” Hypothetically, the God Who Comes would be so pleased with the offering, he’d kill you. Hey, different cultures have different traditions.

Now, knowing this, I’m not sure why Daphne wouldn’t have been a sufficient sacrifice. Or how Maryann could have lived so long and never run into a telepath before last week. We do know, though, that Maenads are poison to the Vampires because of their unselective mating processes: Maryann’s got as much pig blood running through her as she does human.