Rescue Me' Final Season, episode 2

After a slow start to the final season, the show gets its charm back and the women in Tommy's life have a serious period party.


  • Jeffrey Niera / FX

In the first 25 seconds, we learn that there’s not been a fire in NYC in three weeks, Black Shawn blames Tommy’s DNA for Colleen’s wicked bender, and a camera crew sets up in the fire house to tape a 9/11 remembrance piece on Jimmy Keefe, unbeknownst to Tommy. Um, duh. Bad move guys. Did you really think y’all could pull this off without Tommy knowing about this? Apparently Sheila signed a release form, so Tommy storms home to find her. Yes, his home. Apparently her brain damaged kid is always at therapy now, and since Janet and Sheila are total beffers now, his home would be the logical place to find her.

Tommy busts in on the new “motherhood” alliance and proceeds to break it down on how things are going to be in his house. Both women end up a blubbering mess, and then both daughters emerge all PMS-y and teary. Head down, Tommy mopes off to the nearest vagina aisle, where he decides that sniffing Summer’s Eve with his eyeballs is a great idea. Lo and behold, Kelly pops back up and rescues him from the perv police. She announces that she got breast cancer and they go for coffee. She asks him what his legacy is, which opens a huge can of worms in Tom’s head (I can see the visions he’s going to have), only to reveal that her legacy must be something to do her tits and therefore she’s going to have a plaster cast made of her good one and use it as a paper weight. Check please!