The Televangelist: 'Breaking Bad' Season 4, Episode 7

• AMC.com
• "... He'll see me"

Here's a behind-the-scenes moment from being a television reviewer: there are few mental tasks more difficult than struggling to find deeper meaning in an episode of "Entourage," and afterwards having to sit down and consider an episode of "Breaking Bad." My synaptic circuits are completely overwhelmed right now, and I feel like I just crawled up a nearly vertical incline, have gone over the peak, and am now careening at break-neck speed down the mountain. I wonder if this is what a $52,000 joyride feels like?

Another secret: I don't make over seven million dollars a year. If I did, you can bet I wouldn't be sitting here right now, Gustav or no Gustav. I would have already faked my death, bought an island under a false identity, and lived out the rest of my days in slightly paranoid luxury. But this is not the way of the world for Walt, and I spent most of "Problem Dog" with my jaw agape or my teeth clenched or shaking my head as the pieces of a slow puzzle that have been this season so far come together with dizzying results.

Did anyone else believe there was a possibility after Jesse ranted during the group therapy session that the group would break out into applause and someone would come from off screen to hand Aaron Paul an Emmy? It's practically a dead-cert at this point, right? From his painful attempts at cleansing his mind via a POV shooter game (which was not only terrifying but also showed just how much meaning could be embodied by one simple word: restart) to his volunteering to be Walt's hired gun (again) to potentially executing said plan, twice, and then breaking down completely at group. Jesse is being pulled, hard, in two very different directions. Walt coldly appeals to his senses while Mike more warmly appeals to his sensibilities, speaking of loyalty, "which you have … just to the wrong guy." Jesse has been particularly sullen this season, with good reason, and his outburst at group was (as my watch-partner Martha mentioned), the most he's said since Episode 1. Jesse has been petulant, acquiescent, angry, defeated, obedient, defiant, confused, knowing, quiet and loud this season, from one moment to the next. As Walt loudly and obnoxiously self-destructs in front of us like a red sports car in flames in the New Mexico desert, Jesse, mirroring the faceless shirt he wore on the day of the cartel meet, has become a canvas of ever-fluctuating emotions, unsure of who he is and where he is headed next.