Ben's Sports Take: 11 Predictions Guarantees for 2011 (Part II)


Here's the second installment of my list of sportsy-type things that will absolutely, definitely, guaranteed, positively take place over the next 12 months...or not.

I cranked the list up to 11 and each prediction guarantee is progressively more likely to occur as the numbers fall. In other words, the lower the number, the more likely the events are to happen. (But they're all guarantees, so that shouldn't really matter)

7. Chipper Jones plays season on one leg (literally)
After spending the past seven months rehabilitating from ACL surgery, Chipper Jones starts the season at third base and in his usual No. 3 spot in the Braves batting lineup. Unfortunately, recovering from a torn ACL proves harder than Jones anticipated so, in order to make the Opening Day lineup, Chipper is forced to saw off his left leg in an effort to alleviate the pain of his surgically repaired knee.

In an interesting twist, Jones decides to use his recently detached appendage as a bat for what one can only deduce as an act of nostalgic delusion.

After his first at-bat—where he swings, whiffs, falls over and weeps—Jones decides to retire.

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Friday June 10, 2011 10:54 am EDT

I usually reserve these weekly columns for heavily opinionated sports banter that unintentionally infuriates most and enlightens few, but I wanted to pull a U-turn and shed some light on a story that everyone can enjoy.

Former University of Georgia baseball player Johnathan Taylor was paralyzed from the waist down after a collision with teammate Zach Cone fractured a bone in his neck in...

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Friday June 3, 2011 01:32 pm EDT

  • http://clatl.com/atlanta/ImageArchives?by=1223504
  • Thrash headed to his final resting place: Winnipeg

Handfuls of Thrashers fans gathered at Stats sports bar on Friday afternoon to mourn the loss of yet another NHL franchise here in Atlanta.

'790 the Zone' hosted a Wake Ceremony for the seldom relevant franchise complete with a hearse carrying the team mascot and a bagpiper pumping out...

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Friday May 27, 2011 12:01 pm EDT

The DUI and reckless driving charges levied against Braves starting pitcher Derek Lowe nearly a month ago were dropped on Thursday due to fame stature police error?

According to the story in yesterday's AJC, the arresting officer "jumped to a conclusion and made a lot of mistakes" during the April 28th arrest on Peachtree Road in Buckhead.

Lowe, who was driving his 2011 Porsche Panamera,...

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Friday May 20, 2011 12:10 pm EDT


  • Wikimedia Commons
  • This pretty much sums up the past 12 years of Thrashers hockey

With the report surfacing late last night (or early this morning depending on your "stickler-for-detailness") that the sale of our once-beloved, often-neglected NHL franchise has...

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Friday May 13, 2011 12:00 pm EDT

  • Joeff Davis

As if digesting my own defecation wasn't degrading enough, I had to sit through yet another deflating end to yet another disappointing Atlanta Hawks season last night—making the whole poop-eating thing a little less depressing.

Despite snapping a 15-game losing streak in conference semifinal games and winning Game 1 of a second round playoff series for the first time since...

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