“Real Housewives of Atlanta” Season 4, Ep. 3: Gather ‘round and listen to Kim pee

Ep. 3: Gather ‘round and listen to Kim pee

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Tinkle-tinkle. That’s the sound of Kim Zolciak’s tiny adorable bladder letting go of some high-class urine through the closed doors of her Duluth townhouse bathroom. It’s Kim’s 33rd birthday (wow, she looks great for a 43-year-old pretending to be a 33-year-old) and Kim has to pee constantly now that she’s eight months pregnant. It’s not enough to listen in on Kim peeing once in the episode—Bravo producers know what we want and throw it in there twice. Thank you, Andy Cohen. Her footballer baby daddy Kroy Biermann (I guess that makes her a “wag” now) throws Kim a surprise party because good things happen to bad people, like rich, younger husbands and $22,000 bracelets.

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It’s amazing Kim landed Kroy. Not just because he’s 25-years-old and a professional football player, but because she’s more “book smart” while he’s more into hunting and nature. He revealed after his football career, he wants to move to Montana and consult on guns at hunting lodges. A go-getter too! Opposites really do attract. Kim tells Sheree earlier in the episode that she and Kroy took their dating slow, despite being eight months pregnant. Kroy plots with Kim’s abused assistant Sweetie (who’s still convinced that she’s Kim’s friend) to have a little suprise party for the birthday girl. Kroy takes Kim out to an early bird dinner special before arriving back at Kim’s suburban townhouse. Waiting there are Kim’s hairdresser Derek, Kandi, Phaedra and Sheree! Her best friends in the whole world! Even Kim and Kandi’s kids have forced TV bonding time together. While getting a massage, Kim listens in on the girls gossip: