Mixtapes DJ Drama Should’ve Made

Sometimes, success is more of a liability than it’s worth. Just ask DJ Drama. The “iPod King” changed the game with his artful mixtapes and carried the South on his back, practically guaranteeing platinum success for geographic underdogs such as Lil Wayne, Young Jeezy and T.I. But the RIAA couldn’t see the forest for the trees and decided to throw stones. Haters. Still, there are plenty of people desperate for good PR who will view Drama as the solution vs. the problem. Just imagine what a Gangsta Grillz mixtape could’ve done for some of last years’ losers:

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1) George Bush: You can push a war agenda till the cows (or body bags) come home. But nobody’s buying that machismo without a hot beat and some inspired ad-libs to ride to. Gyeaaahhhhh.

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2) Janet Jackson: J.D. could’ve kept his day job at Virgin and she could’ve kept her clothes on in all those magazine cover shoots. On second thought ...

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3) Bill Campbell: There isn’t much that could’ve kept the former mayor from seeing prison time, but at least he could’ve gone down with enough street cred to keep the sharks at bay during his stint.

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4) “The ATL” theme song: Now we know what Dallas Austin was on when he made that corny song for the mayor’s re-brand Atlanta campaign. It’s nothing a hellacious remix can’t fix. Shirley Franklin, meet DJ Drama.

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5) Kevin Federline: Britney’s baby’s daddy may go down in history as the worst (white) rapper ever. And honestly, there ain’t a damn thing Drama could’ve done about it.