Atlanta Rollergirls
On Sun., July 17, the Atlanta Rollergirls put on their first expo bout at Stone Mountain's All American Skating Center. Hosted by Uncle Laffo and Rotknee, the triple-threat bill featured Apocalypstix, the Denim Demons and the Sake Tuyas warmin' up and heatin' things up to a musical mix including Judas Priest, AC/DC, Black Sabbath, Black Diamond (the all-femme KISS cover band) and "Xanadu." But this is Atlanta - the fertile crescent of gittin' crunk - so here are CL's suggestions for clobberin' tracks when the real competitions start next month:1) "Move Bitch" - Ludacris: Luda is a real Negrodamus, forecasting this sporting revival since 2000 as he called for people to "throw them 'bows" and roll out his business. Who knew all dem ho's was out making the booty clap for roller derby?2) "Throw It Up" - Lil Jon: Come on, most of the audience was dudes. They'd be lying if they said they didn't wanna holla to see girls in miniskirts and fishnets get taken down and scrub da ground. Skeet skeet skeet.3) "Mama Said Knock You Out" - LL Cool J: Ladies Love Cool James, and ladies also love knocking each other on their asses to this classic fight song.4) "Theme from Mortal Kombat": The joy of Midway's Mortal Kombat games was always the fatality. So you'll have to excuse me if I listen to the 1993 rave remix of this theme with the perverse fantasy that someone will rip out another skater's spine column and use it as a whip. Test your might, indeed.5) "Smack My Bitch Up" - The Prodigy: Man, there's nothing hotter than women hating on women the best way they know how: like men. I mean, that jammer was asking for it, you saw her outfit.