Super Visions: Presentiments and predictabilities

• Courtesy NBC
• HOUDINI: Eddie Izzard in "Hannibal."

Me: Hey! Agents of SHIELD!

Agents of SHIELD: Wha? Who? Me?

Me: Yeah, you. Did I wake ya?

AoS: Well, uh —

Me: Thought so. Someone needed to do it.

AoS: Who is —

Me: Don’t worry about who this is. Hey, nice curve ball there in “A Fractured House!” Prisoner transport, right near the end of the ep, an escape. Wow. Nobody saw that coming.

AoS: Seriously?

Me: Sarcastically. C’mon, don’t people in the Marvel universe watch television? Don’t lie! I saw 'em watching Belgians on the tube in this very ep!

AoS: What’s your —

Me: My point is, hello, leg irons. Shackles. Straitjackets! Eddie Izzard escaped pretty much the same way on "Hannibal." Eddie. Izzard*. If you want us to be surprised when some criminal turns a prisoner transport van inside out, you better bring some Houdini shit! Handcuffs? In that case, why not put the soon-to-be-free perp in a couple of finger traps and slide some flypaper under his ass?

AoS: You sound disappointed. …

Me: I am disappointed. Though I did like the Dalek on Fitz’s computer screen, but don't change the subject: I’m devoting the rest of this blog to something good. Or at least promising.

AoS: What blog — click

So, raise your sallow, rudimentary mitts if you saw the Minions trailer. No?

I won’t be strident because I myself am remiss here. I thoroughly enjoyed Despicable Me but haven't yet seen its initial sequel. The trailer for this prequel starts beautifully and out-Waterworlds Waterworld by morphing the Universal logo into Pangaea, the ancient supercontinent whose fragments are probably beneath you readers’ collective bums right now. The montage that follows, showing the minions’ pre-Despicable Me bosses, is also delightful as it zigzags from prehistory to history to fantasy and back. And that last zag? Did not see it coming. Seriously. Not sarcastically. Want to see this movie.

Anybody have a copy of Despicable Me 2 I can borrow?

• Which rhymes with neither “gizzard” nor “Grizzard” (as with orange, nothing rhymes with “Grizzard”). “Izzard” has a short I and takes a double stress. I know. I asked him.