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The Blotter: Beefy brawl

Bizarre stories from Atlanta police reports

A 20-year-old woman recently called police to her grandmother’s house in Mechanicsville. “[She] advised me that several girls she didn’t know but followed ... on Instagram had posted videos to Instagram,” the cop noted. “The unknown females were outside a house she described as her grandmother’s house and yelling for her to come out and squash some beef. She was not concise nor completely forthcoming about the situation that got her involved with the unknown females. [She] stated she only knew it had something to do with her grandmother being a lesbian.”

The woman said one of the unknown females was armed with a knife. “At some point, glass broke, possibly due to a knife being thrown at the window, but [the woman] could not advise when it happened,” the cop noted.

Bang your head

Police received a call about an inebriated man stumbling down the street in East Atlanta. When a cop found the tipsy guy, “he was head-butting the telephone pole” on Memorial Drive.

“He was talking to himself in heavily slurred words and the front of his pants were soaked in what was most likely his own urine,” the cop noted. “[The man] said he had been drinking all day with ‘some guy’ and that I needed to go get his money back for him. All [the man] would talk about was that he went ‘somewhere’ with ‘someone’ and he passed out from drinking too much. When he woke up, he began to walk home and then noticed that he didn’t have his money anymore.”

The cop continued: “The entire time that I was talking to [the man] he was stumbling side to side and even fell over twice onto the sidewalk.” The man, 54, went to jail, charged with disorderly conduct.

Dairy discord

Recently in West Atlanta, a mother called police to resolve a milk fight involving her adult offspring. Apparently, the woman’s 22-year-old son strolled into the kitchen, opened the refrigerator, and “took a drink from a milk carton without pouring it into a glass,” a cop noted. “His older sister confronted him about not pouring the milk into a glass cup and [the son] became upset and spit milk into [his sister’s] face. When his mother tried to speak with him about it ... he [allegedly] began charging toward her ... in a threatening position.”

The sister said she jumped in front of her mother before her brother got too close, and her mother wasn’t touched. “They both advised that his behavior has recently changed for the worse,” the cop noted. Our milk-spitter went to jail.


At a local strip club, a middle-age man described a bizarre encounter with one of the club’s exotic dancers. “[He] stated that he received a dance from the entertainer inside the club for an agreed price,” a cop noted. “The entertainer then invited [the man] to go back to the VIP section ... for more entertainment. Once in the VIP section of the club, the entertainer ... informed him that she wanted to do something more sexual with him. [The man] said he refused to conduct sexual acts” with the stripper.

Apparently, “no” is not a word this stripper wanted to hear. The man said he started to depart the VIP section when the dancer hurled an ashtray toward the man. Then the exotic dancer reportedly tried to escape. The man said he went to the parking lot and stood behind the dancer’s car to prevent her from leaving before police arrived. Next, he said the stripper walked back into the strip club and somehow vanished. Police scoured the strip club looking for the dancer. No luck.

The man said he wants to press charges against the dancer.

Mean green machine

In Little Five Points, a 44-year-old man said he was walking north on Sinclair Avenue when two men approached. One of the men had green tattoos covering most of his face. The first man said, “Hi.” The tattooed man alledgedly pulled out a small black gun and demanded the victim’s backpack, money, and credit cards.

The man handed over his stuff and gave the thieves a fake PIN number for his debit card. The tattooed man and his accomplice were long gone when police arrived.

Police noted two other recent pedestrian robberies with a thief matching the same description: A man in his early 20s with his face covered in green tattoos.

Items in the Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.

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