The Blotter November 08 2006

A NAKED MAN pushed and shoved two construction workers on Pearl Street, a witness said. The man was yelling obscenities at the construction workers, and they were in fear for their lives, they said. When police arrived, the man had put all his clothes back on — except for his shoes. The man kept saying, "My cousin did it, and I believe...." An officer asked, "What do you mean by that?" The man just laughed. The man, age 24, went to jail.

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A MAN IN A YELLOW SHIRT was yelling about the loss of a Florida football game and broke a fence at a bar on Roswell Road, a witness said.

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The man apparently broke the top rail off the fence. Then, the man left on foot. A police officer arrived and looked around for the man. He found him on Irby Avenue. The man said he was sorry, and he lost it over the football game. The officer gave him a warning not to return to the bar on Roswell Road. The man said he knew the bar's owner by name. He said if he paid for the damages, could he return to the bar someday? The officer said that was up to the bar owner. The man, age 24, smelled like alcohol, the officer noted.

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AN OFFICER responded to a call about a suspicious car at a gas station on Pharr Road in Buckhead. The officer noted that the driver had a "loud odor" of alcohol. The driver said he'd been drinking all day at a football game. He was driving a blue Ford Explorer, which was extensively damaged. The man said he was very sorry for damaging his mother's car. He went to jail for DUI. The man, age 30, lives on Dellwood Drive.

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A SECURITY GUARD asked a woman in green jeans to leave an apartment complex on Springdale Road. According to the guard, the woman refused to go and started yelling and cursing at her. So the guard called police.

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When an officer showed up, the woman said she was hearing voices from the grave. She said she was frightened and scared. The woman, age 38, was taken to the psychiatric ward at Grady Memorial Hospital.

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AROUND 9 A.M., a man started peeing on the steps of the federal courthouse on Walton Street, according to what a federal security officer said. The man, age 61, went to jail.

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A Suspicious PACKAGE was reported behind a bank on State Street. The caller said the package had been there for about 45 minutes. An Atlanta police officer arrived, as did a SWAT bomb squad and a Homeland Security investigator. The bomb squad got closer to the suitcase and realized it was open and filled with canned food.

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A SUSPICIOUS PACKAGE was reported on Spring Street. An officer arrived and saw a brown paper bag on a garbage can. A white piece of cardboard was taped to the bag. It read: "Give to the FBI. Pull up look on back." Also, a phone number was written on the paper. The officer looked inside the bag and saw a black plate with an orange tube connected to it. The officer called his supervisors to the scene. A lieutenant started to place police units around the building to stop traffic. He set up a command post for all units to meet. Homeland Security and a bomb squad showed up. "It was determined to be a bag of trash," the officer wrote.

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A MIDDLE-AGED MAN returned home one afternoon and turned off the burglar alarm. He noticed that the back door was damaged near the lock, but didn't think anyone had entered the house.

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About two hours later, he realized his mayonnaise jar filled with coins was gone. About five hours after that, the man realized he and his wife's safe filled with jewelry was missing from the master bedroom. The safe contained about $40,000 worth of jewelry, including two diamond rings, a Tiffany's diamond necklace and an antique gold watch. Also, their flat-screen TV was gone.

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The man and his wife live on Robin Hood Drive.

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A MAN WAS SLEEPING on the front porch of a group home on Crew Street. The manager woke him up and told him to leave — several times. The man refused to go. The man said if the manager would give him some food, then he would go. So the manager went inside, prepared a sandwich, and gave it to the man. The man tucked the sandwich in his shirt pocket and went back to sleep on the porch. The manager called the cops. The man, age 28, went to jail.

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TWO MIDDLE-AGED MEN walked into a liquor store on Northside Parkway, but they didn't buy anything. Later, the owner was reviewing surveillance cameras and saw tape of the men putting bottles of cabernet wine in their pants. They allegedly stole eight bottles of wine, worth a whopping $1,641.60. One man was described as wearing glasses, a dress shirt and tan slacks.

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AT A CAR DEALERSHIP on Metropolitan Parkway, a woman was trying to cut a deal on a 2005 Ford Focus. An employee said the woman was upset because they couldn't reach an agreement on a monthly payment for the car. So, he said, she threatened to kill everyone in the dealership, including the customers. Then, he said, the woman drove away in the Ford Focus — and now she refuses to return the car. A "stolen car" police report was filed.

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Items in The Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.