Karma Cleanser - August 14 2002
Sold: Annoying Ani DiFranco records — and my soul
Dear Karma Cleanser:
At the beginning of my second year in the dorm I moved in with a casual acquaintance of mine, a girl I knew through common friends. Once we moved in together, things started to get pretty annoying pretty fast. She had a terrible habit of coming back to the room after her last class of the day and blasting her Ani DiFranco albums at top volume. Usually I was in the room studying or sometimes even trying to take a nap. Though I asked her to be a little courteous, she never would listen. And so, one night when she was out of the room, I took all of her CDs and a few of mine also and sold them at a used-CD store. She came home to find the dorm room door left wide open, so she assumed they had been stolen. The next semester she moved out. I never admitted to my crime. Until now, that is.
-- Bad Girl
Rude roommates, sadly, are the rule, not the exception. But your actions are inexcusable, even if they were prompted by overwrought (and overrated) folk music. When next you encounter such surly behavior, we suggest you resort to something other than petty burglary. We predict that you will similarly lose all of your favorite CDs in a nasty break-up someday, if not already.
br>?Dear Karma Cleanser:
It was the first weekend back to school and of course, we were partying. My friend and I later went back to his room, a little tipsy. I felt sorry for him in a way: He was 20 and still a virgin in all senses of the word — he still hadn't even kissed anyone. So, even though I wasn't attracted to him, we started making out. He hadn't shaved in a day and his face was all scratchy. He really didn't know what he was doing and ended up rubbing my face raw. I didn't realize that it was so bad until the next day when my chin scabbed over. I was so pissed — back to school and looking like a freak — that I didn't talk to him for a week. I felt bad because he thought I was rejecting him after the kiss, but really I was just mad about a big ol' scabby face.
Scabs are never sexy, but neither are pity fucks. Just say no to both.
Hey kids, for more campus-related Karma goodness, check out our special College Survival Guide insert in this issue.
Been bad? Send your confessions, questions and dirty little indiscretions to firstname.lastname@example.org.