Hollywood Product - Freddy vs. Jason

Genre: Horror/comedy

The pitch: Dream demon Freddy Krueger, grumpy that his legacy of horror (and franchise dollars) has withered, resurrects hockey-masked Jason Voorhees to terrorize teens in Springwood. But when Jason's killing spree cuts in on Freddy's turf, it's scissors vs. rock in a B-movie boogeymen fantasy match.

Money shots: In their first battle, Jason immediately disarms the razor-clawed Freddy — literally. Freddy appears to a stoned victim as a creepy hookah-smoking caterpillar, who comes with some truly killer weed. Jason hurls a flaming machete through a drunken partier and seriously freaks out a group of ravers.

Flesh factor: High. The first bared breasts show up roughly five minutes into the film, a tongue-in-cheek flashback to Jason's disdain for horny camp counselors.

Source material: Pretty much every scene alludes to either the Friday the 13th or Nightmare on Elm Street series, from an opening on Elm Street itself to a final battle at Camp Crystal Lake. Thankfully, neither Wes Craven's New Nightmare or Jason X are referenced.

Star power: Robert Englund resumes the Freddy role for the umpteenth time. Kelly Rowland of Destiny's Child plays a smart-mouthed heroine who almost avoids the ax.

Best line: A rattled teen who's just seen Jason slice and dice several friends: "Dude, that goalie was pissed about something."

For nerds only: The film finally shows extended origin sequences for both baddies, and gives a new pseudo-mythic explanation for their powers and weaknesses.

Body count: About 13 characters meet the Reaper, not counting random extras. The grand finale devolves into a human demolition derby, but leaves room for a sequel (God forbid).

The bottom line: Director Ronny Yu manages to make an appropriate — and entertaining — homage to both franchises. He gently spoofs the source material but squeezes in enough gore and gross-out humor to create a fast-paced nostalgia trip for the '80s hack-and-slash genre. Who eventually wins this insanely contrived rivalry? We all do. ? ? ? ? ?