Millie's five best DJ names ever

DJ Business Casual counts 'em down and doesn't make 'em up

Everyone wants to be a DJ. You play what you want, get paid and have free drinks all night. The best part about it — you get to make up a name, and the best ones are always funny and never serious. Millie De Chirico, aka DJ Business Casual, spins at Mary's on Thursdays and gives us her pick of the best DJ names.

1) DJ Scratchatory Rape: My friend in L.A. was telling me about Dragonboy Suede [the comedian] and that's his DJ name.

2) DJ Heart Disease (The Number One Killa in America): My friend Farzad's alter ego. Stunning!

3) MC Five Hour Boner: That is what Ben [the manager at Mary's] goes by when he spins. I think it comes from an inside joke we had. Not to keep reppin' for Mary's or anything ...

4) DJ I No Y Da Caged Bird Sings: Ben also came up with this one and we've always wanted to use it for something.

5) DJ Walter Matthau: You can probably tell, I love DJ names that are either entire sentences long or the names of actual famous people. Every time I see a flier for his night, a part of me believes it could be the real Walter Matthau, and that makes me happy.

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