Lee Satterfield’s pet peeves

Lee Satterfield has been bopping around the local arena for a number of years now — first as the notoriously wacky singer of Treephort, then as Swayze’s venue and comic-shop owner, and finally as the nonsensical mastermind behind Lazer Attack (playing at Swayze’s Dec. 21, 6:30 p.m. $10). Being on both sides of the dingy velvet rope has proven valuable for the musician/business owner. Maybe that’s why Swayze’s takes a slightly unconventional approach to making ends meet by holding all-ages shows and refusing to book “old-men rock ‘n’ roll.” Satterfield understands the need to keep music fun, unadulterated and young, but inevitably there are some annoyances that come with building a business out of what you love.

1) Old-men rock ‘n’ roll: “I do not book bar bands. If you sound like Nickelback, or Godsmack, you’re going to get the pink slip.”

2) Bands that litter: “If you litter, it says a lot about you. You’re a fucking litterbug!”

3) Got a watch? “Don’t show up early, that’s annoying. Don’t show up late, that’s annoying. Just be on time.”

4) Illiterate musicians: “Bands calling and asking for booking information when it was already posted where they got the number from.”

5) Weekend warriors: “People that wear the T-shirt of the band they’re coming to see and/or pull up playing the band’s music.”