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The Blotter: Strange pointy object

A cop was called out to a car accident on I-20 West. “Upon speaking with [the driver] I could detect a strong odor of alcohol on her breath,” the cop noted. The cop asked the woman where she was coming from. “She stated she had left work ... and was headed home to [Gwinnett County] which is northeast from the city and she was traveling westbound in the opposite direction,” the cop noted. The driver, 20, admitted that she’d had two cups of wine. “Before beginning field sobriety tests, I asked [the woman] what she was holding in her right hand. The item was in a Kroger shopping bag,” the cop wrote. “I believed the item to be a bottle of wine. [The woman] advised me it was a dildo.” The cop placed the bag back into the woman’s car before starting her sobriety tests.

The cop asked the woman to do the standard walk-the-line sobriety test. The woman proceeded to take three steps and do a complete circle. Then she took four steps and pivoted to make another complete circle. “I’m not sure what to do,” the woman said.

After flunking a few more tests, the woman was charged with DUI and underage drinking. Her dildo, $235 cash, and her cell phone, were turned in to police property.

Outta luck truck

A 50-year-old man flagged down a police officer and offered a bizarre tale about how his 25-year-old pickup truck was stolen.

The man said earlier that day he met up with a female friend. “He said he agreed to pay her $40. He gave her the money,” a cop noted. “He claims they have only known each other for three months, but he does not know her last name, or where she lives, but she has been in his house several times. [He] was adamant that she is not a prostitute.”

Apparently, his lady friend asked him to drop her off at a local bicycle repair shop so she could pick up something she needed before they hooked up. “She returned shortly and said she needed to go take care of something before she could go to his house. She left and he waited. She returned about 90 minutes later, at which time he got upset and asked for his money back because she took too long to come back. She refused to return the money and they began to argue loudly,” the cop noted.

Two large men playing chess nearby decided to get involved in the argument. One man picked up a stick as they got closer to the arguing couple. “[The victim] said at this point he was standing outside his car and he felt threatened by the two approaching subjects, so he decided to take off running, leaving behind his car with the keys in the ignition,” the cop wrote. “He said he ran instead of driving off because his vehicle is not very reliable and he did not want to take the chance of it not starting.”

A few minutes later the man returned to retrieve his pickup truck, but it was gone.

Brain drain

A woman said she was driving on North Highland Avenue near Little Five Points when an Atlanta police car pulled up behind her. “[The woman] stated she did what was expected to do and pulled over to the right shoulder of the road,” a cop noted. “She stated when she did so, she made contact with a storm drain. [She] stated the storm drain damaged her vehicle. The drain covers the curb and sidewalk and only extends two to three inches from the curb.”

The cop listened to the woman’s complaint before delivering the bad news: “If the patrol vehicle did not make contact with her and did not force her off the road, making contact with the drain was on her and not the city.”

The woman wanted the city to tow her car and repair the damage because she had no money and she was living “penny to mouth.” Also, the cop noted that the woman “directed her dissatisfaction toward me saying I was not friendly enough and that I did not apologize for her hitting the drain.”

Study harder

A 22-year-old woman recently called police and said she was swindled out of $900. The woman said she received a call from a New Hampshire phone number and “stated the caller advised her he was with the IRS and that she needed to pay her student taxes. [The woman] stated the caller told her she would be ... taken to jail if she refused to pay the taxes,” a cop noted. According to the woman, the caller instructed her to wire $900 to an attorney handling her case in North Carolina. The woman followed the caller’s instructions and wired the money. The woman said she also gave her driver’s license number to the caller before she figured out it was a scam.

Items in the Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.

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