Karma Cleanser - September 11 2002

Dear Karma Cleanser:
I have a problem and need some help to keep me from making some really bad karma for myself. I've been married now for a little under two years to a man who is in the armed forces. We met, dated and got married in a very fast amount of time: just over two months. Now he is out of town and, I'm sad to say, out of mind. We talk on the phone maybe once a week and meanwhile I live a basically single life. We never had children, thank God. However, I'm very attracted to a man who has started working in my office. Scott came to work for my company back in the spring, and he and I have lunch together a couple of times a week.

Here is my problem. I do not want to cheat on my husband, even though he is out of the country and I do not feel very close to him at all. I enjoy the financial benefits of the marriage — my husband gets paid a lot more because of his married status. Yet I'm more and more drawn to Scott, and I'm afraid that something is about to happen between us. Tell me what to do to keep myself from creating a bad situation.

b>-- Alone in the South

News flash: You've already created a bad situation for yourself. You rushed into a commitment with a man who, like it or not, isn't available. And even if G.I. Joe weren't a continent away, you still face the age-old trap of workplace romance, a sticky situation at best. Here's our advice: Be patient. Rather than rushing from one bad situation into another, why not sit back and see what happens? The universe has a habit of working these snags out.

br>?Dear Karma Cleanser:
I just read your column and feel a need to respond ("Don't do shots," Aug. 21). If "Darva" truly did have her sights set on "James" for a while, as you said, then I think their little hook-up would have happened sooner. Chances are this was just an alcohol-fueled mistake that both parties probably already regret. The writer of the letter, though, should apologize for being such a prude and intruding in the private affairs of her friends. In this day and age, people fall into bed together all the time even when it's not a good idea. The letter writer was simply overreacting.

b>-- Shots are not so bad

Ummm, OK, is this James or Darva writing? C'mon, the Karma Cleanser can't be fooled.

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