Omnivore - Never trust a Crazy Apple

These flavored apples are cray cray


Following in the footsteps of the masterminds behind the Grāpple, the folks at Crazy Apples, Inc. decided that boring, apple-flavored apples were très passé.

So in an attempt to fix something that wasn’t necessarily broken to begin with, “fruit entrepreneur” Greg Berndt came up with these individually packaged apples in three new EXCITING flavors: Pomegranate Grape, Tropical Blast, and Bubble Gum. (Ingredients: whole apple, natural flavorings, with no added sugars or preservatives.)

On this particular day, Crazy Apples were on sale at Publix for $1 each, (Grāpples, you may recall cost $4.99/four-pack). So was it worth paying double the price of a regular apple for one that reeked of old-school Bazooka Bubble Gum? In a bizarre turn of events, it kinda was.

Unlike Grāpples, the flavor of Crazy Apples is subtle, and light. The aromas foreshadow powerful, synthetic flavors, but as it turns out, true apple flavor is what comes through most. According to the product’s slogan, “Kids love them!” it would seem that Crazy Apples are just some ploy meant to trick kids into eating evil, healthy snacks. But let’s be honest, what kids don’t like eating apples? Even the pickiest, hamburger-and-hot-dog-only ones are pretty much pro-apple.

It’s hard to argue that bubble gum apples are at all necessary, and not entirely ridiculous, but can we forgive the adulteration of apples just because they’re