The Lashes

Get It - Columbia Records

The Lashes — with their skinny ties, tight-fitting jackets and perfectly disheveled hair — look like they were plucked right off the same assembly line that produced the Star Spangles and Jet. Their music, meanwhile, liberally borrows from just about every rock band from 2000 to the present.

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Either way, the Seattle-spawned Lashes are about as authentic as an Al Gore Halloween mask. It would be easier to excuse the blatant parasitism on Get It if the album offered the occasional guilty pleasure, but vocalist Ben Clark’s curdled, affected British accent and stilted lyrics obscure what little enjoyment might be derived from these third-generation melodies.

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Those looking for a “My First Strokes Song” need look no further than “Safe to Say,” outfitted with start/stop dueling guitars in blatant homage to Nick Valensi and Albert Hammond Jr. “A Pretty Girl Is Like a Melody” fancies itself a lost Weezer track off the green self-titled album (in case it wasn’t obvious from the title), replete with a “Hash Pipe”-esque bassline and the requisite 20-second guitar solo. Sadly, the Lashes can’t even stick to decent source material, as they proceed to ape Jimmy Eat World at its sweetest with “The World Needs More Love Letters.”

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If imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, then the Lashes may be the most earnest band on the planet. Unfortunately, such slavish devotion just makes me want to get my hands on the real thing.