The Blotter: Off the deep end

Recently, a woman forced her kids to swim in the pool outside the Carter Center. (It’s a decorative pool with fountains — not a swimming pool.) According to the police report, a security guard said, “She seemed very demented and started to yell and act very strange and combative.” Instantly, the guard called 911. A cop arrived and spotted the woman “yelling and screaming at three children.” The woman was “wearing a purple-colored short dress only. No undergarments (half nude),” the officer noted. “In a very deep voice, she began yelling at the children.” “The devils are here, don’t talk to them,” the mother boomed.

The officer spoke with the kids: an 11-year-old girl, and two boys, 9 and 7. They said their mother forced them to swim laps in the pool — fully clothed. (The kids’ clothes were soaking wet from pool.)

The cop arrested the mother, who started spitting and kicking in handcuffs. Cops went to mother’s car and retrieved dry clothes for the kids. Apparently, the woman and her kids live in Loganville. The cop tracked down the children’s father, who came and got the three kids. The mother, 29, went to jail on several charges.

Mumbo jumbo

A cop dealt with a brother-sister dispute on Middleton Road near Wisteria Gardens. A 29-year-old woman told her brother to get his stuff out of her home because she didn’t want to store his crap anymore. They argued and the brother left. Later, the sister looked out a window and saw her brother lurking with a brick. The sister was scared that he might break something, so she called police.

An officer asked the brother what was going on. “He advised that he did not care anymore and he wanted me to just take him to jail,” the officer noted. “I told [the brother] that he had not done anything to warrant going to jail, and he replied he wasn’t trying to hear that and just take him to jail.”

The brother asked, “What do I have to do? Terroristic Threats? Charge me with a felony then — I don’t care!”

The brother decided to up his game. Turning to his sister, he said, “Imma leave, but when I get back imma merk you!” Apparently, “merking” isn’t close enough to being a terroristic threat. Or even logical. The cop refused to arrest the man. So the brother tried again: “When I come back imma break out your window and kill you!” That was enough for terroristic threats. The brother, 32, went to jail.

Design Differences

In Vinings, two construction workers were bickering on the ninth floor of a building-to-be on Northside Parkway. The co-workers could not agree on what type of flooring to install. The argument heated up, and one construction worker pulled out a box cutter and stabbed the co-worker’s stomach. (Apparently, it was a very light stabbing, as far as stabbings go.)

When cops arrived there was no blood on the ninth floor and the injured construction worker had “pinched the wound” closed, according to the police report. He went to a hospital in stable condition. The construction worker with the box cutter was long gone when police arrived. No word on what type of flooring eventually got installed.

Tchotchke Wars

In Kirkwood, snow globes were flying between a couple when police responded to a dispute on Chester Avenue. The wife, 39, said she and her husband were arguing and her husband pointed his finger in her face, then he kept walking up and down the stairs. Then, she said her husband grabbed a snow globe and hurled it at her chest. She retaliated by throwing “a souvenir from another country” — she’s not sure whether the souvenir hit him or not. Her husband grabbed another snow globe and hurled it at a window. The couple wrestled and the wife said she scratched and tried to bite her husband to get him off her. Then, she said, her husband grabbed a rubber rain boot and threatened to throw it at her.

The wife had no physical injuries. The husband had minor red scratches on his neck and face.

He’s just not that into you ... part 499

A 39-year-old woman said her “boyfriend” stole her debit card and used it to pay for escort ladies and services at backpage.com and similar websites. The boyfriend allegedly spent $1,200 of her money on sleazy websites and now she wants him arrested.

Items in the Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.