The Blotter February 01 2006

A MAN checked on a vacant house that he owns on Norfolk Street. He found a homeless man inside the house. The homeless man, age 20, said he relocated to Atlanta because of the flooding in Mississippi and he didn’t have enough money to stay in the shelter. The homeless man was arrested for trespassing.

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A 34-YEAR-OLD WOMAN walked into the Zone 6 police precinct and said her ex-boyfriend (and father of her child) was threatening her. She said her ex-boyfriend was at a pay phone next to the police precinct. He called her and said, “I am going to fuck your friend’s car up, bitch,” and “You are going to see a lot of me real soon.” Police promptly arrested the ex-boyfriend, age 48, and took him to jail.

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A 27-YEAR-OLD WOMAN contacted police and said she’s concerned that her ex-boyfriend could mistreat other women like she had been. The woman said her ex-boyfriend did not go to counseling for his misconduct, as he agreed to do. The details of the incident involve the ex-boyfriend putting his mouth on her vagina while they were making out. She didn’t leave or call police when this occurred, however. The woman said she’s had an off-and-on relationship with this man for about a year, and she wants his actions documented. A police report was filed.

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ON PIEDMONT AVENUE, an officer was flagged down by a man who said he was being harassed and stalked by a female co-worker. The man said his car (a red Grand Cherokee Jeep) was vandalized with phrases such as “Fatty Loser,” “Piece of Shit,” “Tall Ugly Mutha Fucker,” “I Suck,” “Fat Dick” and “Munz Monkeys.”

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AT A BOOKSTORE ON PIEDMONT AVENUE, a thin man started yelling at a clerk for no apparent reason. Another employee asked him to leave. The thin man spit in the employee’s face and hit his head with a Pepsi bottle. He was arrested for simple battery, among other charges.

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A MAN said someone dumped a huge pile of cement in the front yard of his home on Delaware Avenue, causing a big mess. He said a cement-mixer truck was spotted in the area shortly after the incident took place.

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ON GREENSFERRY AVENUE, a woman said a man dressed in a white shirt and tie came to her apartment and offered to sell her some coupons for Papa John’s Pizza. The coupons looked legit, so the woman bought the coupon package for $25. When she called Papa John’s to place an order, however, she was told that the coupons were fake. She canceled the $25 check.

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A GRAY TOYOTA TRUCK was going too fast on I-75/85. The officer clocked the truck at 85 mph. The officer pulled the car over and spoke with the driver, a 31-year-old Louisiana man. The driver said he was in a hurry to get to his medicines, which were at home. The officer asked, “Have you been drinking?” The driver said his passenger had been drinking, but not him because he’d had a kidney transplant. The officer asked, “Why don’t you have your medicine with you?” The driver said he didn’t know he was going to be out late. The officer asked him to get out of the car. Again, the officer asked, “Have you had anything to drink?” “No, sir,” the driver said, adding that he had just had a kidney transplant and he doesn’t drink. (This conversational exchange repeated itself one more time.)

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ON FAIRBURN ROAD, a middle-aged man said when he arrived home, he saw two men in a gold Chrysler sedan in his back yard. He said the men appeared to be going through his stuff. When the middle-aged man confronted them, one man acted like he was going to pull out a gun. The man said he was there because he thought they fixed cars. An officer was sent to the home: Turns out, the gold Chrysler was stolen.

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A 41-YEAR-OLD MAN got a harassing phone call from an unknown man who said, “I hate cocksuckers and Puerto Ricans.” (The 41-year-old man is homosexual and Puerto Rican.) After the call, the man heard something outside his apartment door. He walked outside and saw that his red pickup truck had been covered in paint stripper. No suspects.

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A WOMAN walked into a clothing store on Jonesboro Road. She grabbed a few dresses and entered the fitting room. When she emerged, she was wearing five dresses: a black dress, an orange dress, a blue dress, and a lime green dress — all underneath her own dress (which was orange). A clerk tried to stop her, but the woman wearing five dresses pushed him aside and ran. She was gone before police arrived.

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A WOMAN said someone broke into her car outside her home on East Cedar Lane. The windows were pried open on both sides of the car, causing $500 worth of damages. The only item reported stolen: A soda valued at $2.

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Eventually, the driver took a breath test — which came back positive for alcohol. Then his story changed: He said he’d had half a beer with a steak. The driver was arrested for DUI. The driver called the officer a “fuckin’ asshole” and admitted that he was loaded.

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Later that evening, the middle-aged man called police again. He said the suspect was still harassing him. The middle-aged man and his wife believe the suspects possibly buried items in their back yard, and were coming back to get them. The middle-aged couple has lived in the home for 30 years. No suspects.

?Items in The Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.