THE BLOTTER: Suspect calls 911 on himself

In Savannah, a man walked into a convenience store at a Shell gas station near the I-95 interchange with GA highway 204. When the man noticed the store clerk stocking a shelf far away from the register, he suddenly went around the counter and used a key hanging from the register to open it and remove cash from the register. The clerk saw what was happening and screamed, causing the manager to come out of the store office just as he saw the suspect leaving the store, who was described as wearing camouflage pants and a black t-shirt pulled up to cover his face.

While canvassing the area, police officers spoke to a Man Wearing Only Boxer Shorts, while sitting under the nearby highway overpass. Cops asked the guy: “Where are your clothes? Why are you wearing only boxers?” The guy said he was just robbed by a male who made him take off his clothes and then stole his clothes.

A different cop interviewed a woman who had just parked her car at a nearby Flaccos Tacos restaurant. The woman said she was approached by a man who asked her to call 911 because he was just robbed. Without giving a reason, the man also asked if he could store his cell phone and some money on top of the her vehicle’s tire while she was inside the taco restaurant.

Also, an officer spoke to an older gentleman who said he witnessed a man running who stopped briefly to take off his pants and shirt, and stash them in the bushes.

Back at the gas station, an officer interviewing the clerk and manager notified other cops that he’d just viewed the gas station’s security camera footage, which showed that when the robber’s black T-shirt was pulled up over his head, tattoos of clouds were visible on his back.

Alas, the Man Wearing Only Boxer Shorts … well, you guessed it. The man in boxers had tattoos of clouds on his back. Police eventually confirmed that this was the same man who asked the woman to call 911 outside the taco restaurant. And he’s also the same man whom the elderly gentleman saw take off his clothes. And yes, the same man who grabbed the cash from the register inside the gas station.

Police recovered the Man Wearing Only Boxers’ overgarments, including his camouflage pants and black T-shirt, along with his cell phone. He went to the slammer on multiple charges, where he got to cover his boxer shorts with a lovely jail jumpsuit.

Special shoutout to a Friend of the Blotter in Savannah for this awesome story tip!

Nine minutes to dance & fuck & catch your flight

A College Park motel was shut down for having stripper poles in guest rooms — not to mention a host of gross health violations. Black mold. Exposed wires. Etc.

There was so much black mold in some rooms, that workers from the Fulton County Board of Public Health couldn’t even open the motel room doors without risking their health.

Nicknamed “Motel Nine,” this Howard Johnson is about a 9-minute drive from Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport. The ramshackle pink-and-white motel is located on Old National Highway off I-85.

Hotel resident Denine Brand, who lives there with her four kids, told Fox5Atlanta,” I don’t know how they could get away with putting (stripper) poles in rooms?”

She adds, “I had no water. They had pipes that bust and I had no water.”

The motel owners did not have a proper business license. The Fulton County Health Board gave the few people remaining in motel about 12 days to relocate.

Sleeping with the enemy

The wife of a Georgia cop is accused of stealing more than $500,000 dollars from her workplace at Holliday Realtors — without her hubby (a sergeant in the LaGrange Police Department) noticing a thing.

Brandy Clower, 39-years-old, was a property manager with Holliday Realtors when the Georgia Bureau of Investigations launched its probe into her financial practices. The GBI also charged Clower with exploitation and intimidation of an elderly person. Clower was booked into Troop County Jail, about 70 miles southwest of Atlanta. Additional charges are expected.

Authorities also investigated Clower’s husband — and came up with nada. Officials confirmed that there was zero evidence of Sgt. Clower violating any LaGrange Police Department policy, violating any law, or participating in any criminal act. “Sergeant Clower voluntarily submitted to, and passed, a polygraph examination,” a police spokesperson confirmed.

And yet still, this experienced police sergeant failed to notice he was sleeping next to an allegedly scheming, law-breaking money-hungry woman apparently willing to abuse the elderly in order to get what she wants? Oh just that.

Motherfucker

On Mother’s Day weekend, an eight-foot alligator squirmed his way into a fenced-in backyard in Houston County, south of Macon. Imagine the family’s shock and surprise when they returned home from an event celebrating motherhood — and found an 8-foot, 2-inch gator playing in their back yard. Animal control workers arrived and tried to capture the wayward reptile — who easily resisted early capture attempts.

This gator is “a fighter,” one animal control worker told WSB-TV.

Eventually, animal control crews were able to wrangle the gator and “release it unharmed back into the wild.” —CL—

The Blotter Diva compiles reports as found in the Atlanta Police Department records and/or in local news reports — and puts them into her own words.