THE BLOTTER: Feel The Force — right there?

A 39-year-old man is accused of breaking into the Buckhead Target on Peachtree Street, after hours.

Atlanta police responded to a call about a possible burglary there around 1 a.m. When cops arrived at the Buckhead Target, they noticed someone had smashed out a large front window.

“The officers put on their gloves, navigated their way over the broken shards of glass, and then proceeded to go aisle by aisle, clearing the store,” Fox5Atlanta-TV reported.

While searching, cops heard a sound coming from the electronics department on the 2nd floor.

Cops found the 39-year-old suspect crouched down in the electronics aisle. The suspect wore Baby Yoda swim shorts and a white T-shirt.

Atlanta police took the suspect into custody and searched him, finding two cell phones that he allegedly tried to steal from Target. The 39-year-old man is charged with burglary, criminal damage to property and theft.

We don’t know exactly where the 39-year-old suspect got his Baby Yoda swim shorts — but Target sells them for $29.99.

The devil inside

In Westside Atlanta, some church members are sweating it out every Sunday, after crooks stole the church’s 5-ton air-conditioning unit — yep, during the late August heat wave.

Exactly how does someone steal a 5-ton air-conditioner? Five tons. That’s 10,000 pounds!

“We know the devil is busy,” the Pastor of Dixie Hills First Baptist Church told 11Alive. “When you have the nerve to steal from God’s house, you’re really bold.”

Must be Satan himself who stole the AC unit during that scorcher last month.

Apparently, thieves cut through steal padlocks and accessed a security cage in order to cut the lines to all the AC units, but only managed to steal one AC unit, the one that cooled the air in all of the rooms for Sunday school and fellowship meetings. Thieves also damaged the lines to other AC units for the rest of the church and its main sanctuary. The pastor estimates replacements and repairs will easily top $12,000. The church is accepting donations to (hopefully) fix the AC before the church’s 91st anniversary celebration this month.

Worst job interview ever

A 35-year-old Atlanta man went to his job interview — and wound up getting arrested and thrown in jail. Get this: The man was applying to become a South Fulton police officer. Of course, the police department did a routine background check during his application. Quickly, the South Fulton Police Department discovered the 35-year-old man had outstanding warrants in Douglas County linked to charges of simple battery, false statements and — unbelievably — falsely reporting a crime. No clue on what this guy’s plan was really — perhaps just make up crimes and arrest people? Authorities threw the wannabe 35-year-old cop in jail, due to his outstanding warrants.

South Fulton Police Chief Keith Meadows tells Fox5Atlanta, “Yesterday’s events, while unexpected, highlight our commitment to maintaining the trust and safety of our South Fulton residents. Our vetting procedures remain rigorous to ensure the caliber of officers we want on our force.”

Dumbest. Job Applicant. EVAH! Here’s a hint: If you’re wanted for crimes, stay away from police. Don’t run toward them. Just a thought.

Stupid move of the month

On Moreland Avenue in n Little 5 Points, a red-headed young man wearing a burgundy shirt walked into a Circle K convenience store around 7:30 a.m. in the morning. He allegedly whipped out a gun and held up the store clerk — but left with only a vape pen and a bottle of water. Here’s the odd part: The red-headed thief asked and even demanded more items from the store clerk. But no, he didn’t receive them — and left with just a vape pen and a bottle of water. Dude, you had a gun. What kind of lame robbery is that? Aim higher.

Reality bites

A Buckhead bar brawl broke out — sending three reality-TV stars to the slammer. The bar brawl erupted shortly before midnight on a Friday night at Lucca Lounge on Pharr Road.

The arrestees: Love and Hip Hop: Atlanta stars Erica Mena, age 35, and “Bambi” Addie Richardson, age 37. Plus a guy named “Zellswag” Rodney Shaw who brawled with a fellow cast-mate on Love and Hip Hop: Hollywood back in 2017.

The three reality TV stars allegedly got into a bitter, physical dispute with a security guard. Multiple local media sources reported that Atlanta cops arrived and tried to calm the situation — but Mena, Richardson, and Shaw allegedly got physically aggressive with the cop. Lounge security guards said they asked the reality-TV starts to leave the lounge several times before the brawl happened, according to 11Alive.com.

So off to jail they went — with Erica Mena booked on a felony charges of willful obstruction of police “by use of threats or violence”, according to 11Alive.com. Mena is also facing two charges of simple battery and yet another charge of simple battery on a cop. “Bambi” Addie Richardson faces a misdemeanor charge of obstructing police. “Zellswag” Rodney Shaw also faces charges of simple battery and obstructing police.

A fourth person was also arrested — local media identifies this man as a possible fashion designer.

No word on what actually sparked the bar brawl. Cops are keeping quiet on that one.

Cashing in

Fulton County Jail’s historic arrest of former reality-TV star (and one-time president) Donald Trump is making millions of dollars — for guess who? (Or, so he thinks!)

Within hours of Trump’s now-infamous mug shot (featuring a Stanley Kubrick-style icy glare) being published, Trump’s 2024 presidential campaign released a brand-new series of merchandise featuring the mug shot image: beer Koozies®, bumper stickers, a poster, and, of course, a mug-shot mug.

The Trump campaign told the Associated Press that its biggest fundraising day ever was the day after Trump’s August 24th arrest in Atlanta, raking in over 4 million dollars in 24 hours. And apparently, the savvy mug-shot marketing strategy kept raising millions — at least 7 million dollars in the week following the 77-year-old Trump’s arrest. Who knows if those self-reported campaign dollar numbers are actually true.

The Blotter Diva compiles reports from the Atlanta Police Department and local news reports — and puts them into her own words.